When Life Seems Unbearable
Our twin newborns were about 7 weeks old, we had a three year old, and an 18 month old, and I was drowning. I pulled Jacob into the nursery to let him know that I needed him to step it up. I was drowning and he needed to help me more because I couldn’t go on like this much longer! He quietly listened and waited till I was done then said, “I wish I could help you more, but I’m barely hanging on myself.” He went on to tell me everything he was feeling and going through. It was then that we held each other’s hand and realized we both were giving everything we had to our family and that was enough. We talked and laughed about how hard it was to have twins and the silly but annoying things our older boys were doing. Nothing changed but our attitudes. I no longer felt annoyed or mad when he wasn’t doing everything I thought he should be.
I think about that moment often as we go through this life that often gives us bumps and bruises. Like tonight, I could tell Jacob and I were both just hanging on till bed time. I’m almost 2 weeks post c section and feeling it and he is exhausted to the core working 2 jobs plus helping out around the house as much as he can. We both were really looking forward to bedtime and resting, when our oldest threw up on his way up the stairs.
Neither one of us wanted to clean it up, but someone had to. I offered to clean it up if he took out the garbage, tomorrow is garbage day and I can’t lift hardly anything. But the carpet cleaner was broken, so Jacob fixed it then started to clean up the mess, while I moved the laundry along so we could wash any towels we needed to clean it up. Then we both helped take out the garbage before I cried to him yet again that I wasn’t sure how I could do it all.
Sometimes life seems so big and overwhelming and your not sure how you’ll ever make it through. But that’s why God gave us our loved ones, whether it’s a spouse, a family member, or a friend. Sometimes all we need is a listening ear and a confirmation that indeed life is hard right now, like Jacob and I with our first set of twins. And sometimes we need a helping hand AND a listening ear like I needed tonight.
God sees us and knows our needs and will send help. Because He loves you and often has bigger plans for you than you can imagine.
You are a strength to more than you know Cassandra! Thanks for writing this!
Thank you for your inspiring story. Everyone is going through something difficult, even though we can’t always see one another’s challenges. We just need to be each other’s cheerleaders.